1. Growing up I used to be teased a lot. I mean I know many people were teased growing up, so I’m not wanting anyone to feel sorry for me. To take the words of a girl who went to school with me from third all the way to 12th grade (we are close now, she is my lil big sister) "Everyone in our class is a big family, and Eric is our pet monkey." I’m going to tag her in case anyone thinks I’m just saying it to say it (sorry Domi). For that reason, I've had a low self-esteem for the majority of my life. For a good two years, I ate lunch by myself because I was so sure no one wanted to be bothered with me. Those times made me appreciate people wanting to be around me now, and appreciate people enjoying being around me.
2. I am obsessed with shoes, mostly, but not limited to, sneakers. When I was growing up I had unusually big feet for my age (I started wearing a size. 7 in men’s when I was in 4th grade) and my body for that matter (My feet have not increased in size since I was 13 starting 9th grade, and I wear a size 13). Because of that, I wasn't allowed to get a pair of Jordan's, or any of the more popular kicks growing up, so now that I can, I tend to buy more pairs than I need, it’s not a good habit, I'll grow out of it... one day.
3. I've never been attracted to girls my age. I started school a year early and all the girls I found myself attracted to have been either in my grade or above. As I grew older in age, girls my age (which was a grade behind me) for some strange reason, I tended to look at as if they were childish and immature. Since then there have been some variations from that rule; females who are mature and have direction despite how many years they’ve been living, but for the most part, I still tend to me attracted to older females.... "not Wheezy Jefferson old, just older than me"- Chris Rock
4. “If you want to see how a man will treat you, look at how he treats his mother” Well to be honest, in my life, that’s the complete opposite. For the majority of my life, I have not gotten along with my mother. I lived with her for the majority of my life yet we never were able to get that typical “Mother-son” relationship. My mother is independent and when she and my father broke up, she was convinced that she will accept Child Support, but other than that, she didn’t need him. She wanted me to believe that I didn’t need him either. Nevertheless, I saw the things he did for me in my life being a good father. Instead of pulling me closer to her, she ended up pushing me closer to him. So I have a better relationship with my father than I do my mother. However, my father did tell me the correct way to treat a woman, and most of my friends would agree that I do know how. My mother and I are working on things now; hopefully we’ll get on good terms for once and for all.
5. My first sport, my overall favorite sport, and the sport I am better at than anything is swimming…. Yes swimming (Why do people assume black people don’t like to swim) . I’ve been swimming since I was 3 years old, and I never really stopped. I actually can go to a swim meet and enjoy myself just as much If not more than me going to a football or basketball game, I’m a true fan.
6. I remember the instance where musically my life was changed forever. The very first concert I ever went to was seeing Jill Scott and Mike Phillips (He’s a saxophonist, you should check him out) at Constitution Hall when her first CD dropped. From that point on Music has been an important aspect of my life. And not just Hip-Hop, and R&B, and my hometown favorite Go-Go (Listening to go-go will make you eclectic, lol). Oldies, Rock, Reggae and especially Jazz are also some of my favorite genres. I’ve seen people like Isaac Hayes, Musiq Soulchild, Ledisi, War, Average White Band, KEM, The Roots, Kenny G, Herbie Hancock, Kindred the Family Soul, and many others live in concert in my short lifetime. But one thing musically hasn’t changed since that day: Only two song impress me every time I hear them because of how good the musicians are: Morris Day & The Time, 777-9311 & Funkadelic - Maggot Brain.
7. Some people call me prejudice, but it is what it is… I can never see myself with any white girl…at all. Why? Call it a preference, but I’ve never been attracted to white girls, even the ones who have bodies like Black girls. I like what I like. Give me a brown or chocolate skin girl with some nice legs and a cute smile any day…. And that’s even over a light skin pretty black chick…
8. This one is kinda related to the shoes, but I’m somewhat of a label whore. No, I don’t have it like that; I just look for deals (I Am An EBAY FIEND). Growing up I never had anything new as far as the latest style, my parents had to spend money on other things (see number 9). So now that I have a little pocket change, I like buying nice things, I like looking nice, I like attention and getting compliments on what I’m wearing.
9. From first through 12th grade I was a private school student… The majority of my life. No, my parents didn’t have it like that; no I never got beat with a ruler. ALL the schools I went to were majority black (that’s the way the majority of the private schools in the DC area are). Yes I wore a uniform nearly every day (with the exception of free dress days here and there). Yes, the majority of the people I went to school with are wild, freaks and curses a lot. So if you had any questions on my vulgarity, my *ahem* “wild side” and why I like looking fresh all the time (that’s 12 years of uniforms, Now I can make up fresh outfit days), blame it on my education.
10. LOVE is such a strong word, which is ironic seeing as many people throw it around so gingerly. And though I have close friends who I do love and care about deeply, the hardest thing for me to believe is when someone else says to me “I love you.” I’m not saying that they don’t, I’m just saying it’s hard for me to fathom and grasp that someone can have deep feelings for me in that regard. I’m not being humble when I say that I don’t believe I’m not that much better than anyone else, so sometime I can’t understand why others feel that deeply for me. The same goes for the statements “I care about you” and “I Miss You.”
11. If my heart was any object I use every day, it would have to be a pen, and the ink would be my blood. It’s quite ironic, because as much as I don’t like writing, it happens to be one of the things IM most skilled at doing. As articulate as I am, I express myself better through writing at times…
12. “You Know What Really Grinds My Gears?”~ Peter Griffin. People who never call people. Let me elaborate, I can’t stand [it when] people who rather hold a conversation with someone through text messages than picking up the phone and actually talking to someone.Have we really became that impersonal that we can’t hold a verbal conversation with anyone anymore?…
13. I love to laugh; I love it when something makes me laugh, because when you laugh you can’t help but to feel good. I think people tend to take laughing for granted. It’s something that people do on a regular basis and yet no one stops to dwell on it. I know it sounds weird, but things that are funny make days enjoyable, even when everything else can be going bad; I appreciate the hilarity in life.
14. My two biggest fears involve death. Now I’ve been told that you should not fear death because it is one thing that is inevitable, but the fact is I don’t fear death itself. My first biggest fear is dying and not going to heaven. Like I said, I’ve been in Catholic School my whole life and both sides of my family go to church, Hell as described scares me, direct period. My second fear is dying and not fulfilling my purpose. I think that’s a fear that I share with many people. I have no clue what my purpose is. I know that God gives us all free will, but in this small amount of time I’ve been given on this planet I want to make sure I live, if that makes any sense. I guess to sum it all up, my biggest fear is not having the relationship with God to know what I’m destined to do, and not spending eternity in his presence.
15. There was a time I didn’t notice it, but recently I had a revelation that not having many close friends growing up had an ill affect on choices I make even now. Because I felt that I was always alone, I have subconsciously felt that I did not need anyone to accomplish anything, regardless of the relationship I had with them. Even when a situation is difficult, one of the hardest things for me to do is to go to someone else and admit that I need help, because as close as I wanted people to get to me, the last thing I wanted anyone to know is that I was vulnerable. The bad habit has followed me to college, and though I have gotten better with it, some things I still do, one being that I put up a façade to make it seem that I have it all together, when that has been for from the truth for a long time.
16. My parents divorced when I was two years old. I do not ever recall them being together in a relationship capacity, and for many years, I thought it was my fault that they were not together. My grandparents have been together for 50 years, and I get joy from seeing them together even now. And while I now know that my parents’ not being together is not my fault, it has affected how I view relationships. And though it’s obvious, sometimes I wish it were not true, the fact is I’m a hopeless romantic. Every type of relationship I get myself into starts with the question, “Can I see myself with this person for 1, 5, 10 or more years?” I have been thinking this way since I was the age of 12. The truth is, I long for the days when I can wake up and look at the same beautiful woman every day, and know that with all my flaws she loves me enough to smile at me as if it was the first day I said, “I love you.” And there was a time where I thought any female who would give me the time of day could fill that role. And I have grown past that stage and realized the type of woman that I ideally want to be with. Someone attractive, intelligent, goofy in her own way, spiritually sound and above all beautiful (which, like its counterpart “ugly,” is not an appearance, but how a person is within themselves and has an inner glow about them). Have I met anyone like that in the 20 years I have been living: Yes. And though I know within myself that I am not at a level where I deserve a woman similar to her, I am blessed to be able to call her a friend (T.S.D.). I guess this is my way of acknowledging that though I do not completely know myself, I know that I will not settle for less.
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